Chips and Blocks
by Terra3
Summary: Rezo reflecting on his realtionship with Zelgadis, and how they are alike.


Chips and Blocks  
  
By Terra  
  
No. How many times do we use that word in a single day? I used more often than I should have  
with Zelgadis.  
When my son wrote to me about his wife's and his illness, I rushed over but I came too late.  
They were already decaying on their beds and only a little baby was left. The baby was   
never mentioned to me in the letters he sent back, so I had no idea what he was called.  
"Zelgadis," I said, thinking of my uncle, "That's a good name."  
I took my grandson home, much to my own surprise. I don't like kids. I didn't even like   
HEALING blind kids. Why I married twice and had two kids is beyond me. But then, I never was  
the sole parent in either of those cases. Until then.  
My servant, Abby and her daughter, Eris, thought he was "the cutest thing" they had ever   
seen.   
Zelgadis was rowdy as a toddler, he didn't understand the meaning of "walk". In his mind,   
there was "standing still" and "running at full speed." It drove me up the wall. Even though  
Shabranigdo caused my infamous insanity, I think that alone would have done that as well.  
Zelgadis had a thirst for knowledge. Looking back, I should have been proud and encouraged   
little Zelgadis in his pursuits. Unfortunately, I didn't. No was the word of the century.  
"No, get out of there."  
"No, you can't open that."  
"No, I don't need your help."  
And so on. I think that is what caused our little problems later on in his development.   
When he hit five years old, he did things just to spite me. He pushed his little   
body in the arms of disaster, causing many near-fatal injuries. Of course, I'd yell my head   
off and shake him. In essence, it was my first time actually raising a child, so I didn't   
know better. He would say sorry in the cute way that little boys do and I'd forgive him.   
Then he'd run off to find another way he could push the limits of mortality.   
But through it all, he wanted to be just like me. At age three, he declared,   
"I'm going to be just like you when I grow up, Grandfather!"  
I joked, "I don't think you'll ever be as strong as me though, Zelgadis."  
If I had known the damage I inflicted on him back when I said those fate-sealing   
words, I would have quickly amended myself. I never knew he was going take that joke so   
seriously.  
When he started his strength building regime, I thought it was a healthy pastime,   
someday I would be gone and he would have to defend himself and his family, best start when  
you're young. At the time, I thought it was a phase, he was still madly into stories of The   
Swordsman of Light and Robin Hood. But as time wore on, he continued, putting more and more   
ridiculous demands on himself. What started as a simple thoughtless joke turned into an   
all-consuming obsession. He just wanted to be like me, another legend.   
But as he reached puberty, I believe he found another reason to be strong. Abby had   
just died so, being the nice man I am, took Eris into my home, not knowing she had a huge   
crush on me. I think Zelgadis knew before her mother had even died, because he became more   
obsessed with being strong. I eventually figured it out and laughed silently at it. It was   
just some harmless little girl crush on a legend, nothing to get too excited about. She'd   
grow up and grow out of it, like all girls do. If I had known what she did with all my hair   
that she took out of my comb, I would've sat her down and explained to her that I didn't   
feel that way but I never knew.  
But, my poor Zelgadis, he was madly in love with Eris but nothing he did would   
please her. She wanted me and couldn't stand him because he wasn't me. He tried to impress   
her but his plans fell flat and had the opposite effect. The whole situation was extremely   
funny to me, having lived through it and seen a son go through it, but I bet Zelgadis and   
Eris didn't find it funny at all.  
By the time Zelgadis had reached the infamous peak of puberty (when everything seems  
to be going out of control), I was almost completely consumed by Shabranigdo. My mouth would  
open and words would tumble out but I wasn't opening my mouth and I wasn't saying those   
words. I was trapped in man shaped prison.   
My eyes still refused to open and I was becoming more frustrated than ever and   
having to deal with Zelgadis' "little" mood swings was not helping. I yelled at Zelgadis   
more than was necessary. I really should have given Zelgadis his space. But I was so old and  
he was right smack into a changing body that he didn't completely understand yet, it just   
caused natural friction. That, and I was completely and utterly insane, that made dealings   
hard.  
When he was gliding on the tail end of puberty, I did the worst thing I could have   
done. Locked in my little prison inside my head, I began to notice something. Zelgadis'   
healthy pastime had become an obsession. He didn't care about eating, sleeping, girls (he   
had even lost interest in Eris), nothing except getting strong. It had to stop, he was going  
to burn out.   
I was worrying over this when a dark voice said, "Give him what he wants and teach   
him a lesson at the same time."  
"How can I? His goals are humanly impossible!"  
"The key word is humanly, I notice. But that doesn't matter. There is a way."  
"How? And where did you come from?"  
"I am part of you and you are part of me. I hope you recall your experiments with chimeras."  
"Yes, I wanted to make myself have the sight of the hawk but those failed!"  
"No one can make a chimera of one's self! It is very simple to give your grandson the powers  
of the golem and the demon."  
"But... he will hate me!"  
"It will teach him not to aim so high and to be happy with what he has. You could simply   
remove it when your eyes are healed, since that lead looks promising."  
"The Philosopher's stone lead?"  
"Yes."  
It made sense at the time to mix the strength of the golem, the speed of the demon   
and a dash of my magic in addition to his own to grant my grandson's impossible wish. I wept  
for I knew it would hurt him greatly and I might never again regain his trust.  
But I unwittingly created in that chimera my saving grace. His anger at my betrayal  
led him to Lina Inverse and my freedom from Shabranigdo. In death, I finally saw the world I  
had lived to see.  
But the freedom is overshadowed with dread, for I watch my grandson run around after  
his cure like I had done. I watch him make the same stupid, heartless mistakes that I had   
inflicted on loved ones. I know such efforts are pointless because only Rezo-Shabranigdo   
could cure his condition.  
  
"I'm going to be just like you when I grow up, Grandfather!"  
I just hope that he won't.  
  
The End  
  
Author's Notes: My thoughts on what Rezo went through with Zel. I _do_ believe that Rezo   
didn't give Zel that body just to prove how evil he is. Tell me what you thought at   
destinyplot@lycos.com!  



End file.
